This is going to
be a very long post, and it is one that is not easy for me to share, but I
really want my story to be told correctly, and directly from me.
If you have been
following my blog for sometime, you know that I have been studying journalism
at Ole Miss for the past 2-½ years. Ole Miss really is a fantastic school; it
just is not the school for me. So here is my story on why I decided to
transfer…
College is
something you look forward to basically your whole life. You dream about where
you’re going to go, what clubs/sorority you will join, all the amazing friends
you will meet, as well as all the boys you will meet until you meet Mr. Right (yeah, right!), I could go on
and on about the fantasies I had about college. I couldn’t wait to go off to
college!
I knew my
sophomore year of high school that I wanted to go to Ole Miss for college. From
then on, I had my mind set on it, and that was the only place I would be in
August of 2013. My parents graciously supported my dream of Ole Miss, even if
it was six hours away and they would be paying out-of-state tuition. They
believed it was all worth it because it was my dream.
I have a huge,
beautiful family. The most amazing family in the world! I knew it was going to
be hard to leave them and to leave my beloved hometown of Pensacola. Staying
was never an option, though. I was told ever since I was little how important
it was to get away for college, so that’s exactly what I did. I moved six hours
away to the cutest little town, Oxford, Mississippi.
So what happens
when college is not all that you expected? I was home sick and felt very out of
place, but I was a freshman, that is how you’re supposed to feel, right? Sophomore year I felt a little better, I had
a group of friends that were really great, but still something wasn’t quite
right. I just ignored the feeling, I knew it would go away at some point, I had
everything in the world I needed! My freshman year I joined a sorority and I
don’t regret joining, I met really amazing girls, but I see now I’m not your
typical sorority girl—it just wasn’t for me. After my sophomore year I dropped,
though I wasn’t worried, it made me feel empowered.
Junior year I
still felt that knot in my chest, I was constantly counting down the days until
I could go home again. I never thought of transferring home, I didn’t think it
was an option. I always thought I would just have to endure it until
graduation. This is not how a normal college student should be acting! For all
of you thinking, you should have just gone out more, you’re wrong. I’m not the
type who likes to go out all the time, but when I do go out, I always have fun.
I had some great times at Ole Miss, but I just never felt complete. I missed my
family, but it was more than that. I felt like I didn’t have a purpose, I was
aching to do more than just school work and going out. I wanted to want to do
something, but it seemed all I could do was stay in my apartment all day
watching movies or doing homework.
I finally had a
come to Jesus moment in October of 2015. I was sitting in one of my classes and
I remember thinking, I can’t do this, I can’t stay here another year or two. I
was suddenly filled with terror. These past two years I was just waiting to
feel like a normal college student, but honestly, I was just in denial about
how unhappy I was. I remember coming back to my apartment and breaking down to
my roommate. I then called my mom and told her I wanted to come home. After
that phone call, my mind was made. I would transfer to the University of West
Florida and continue my journalism degree. Never in a million years did I see
myself going to UWF, but now it all seems so perfect.
This was not an
easy decision for me, and I didn’t take it lightly. It took a lot of convincing
to get my family on board and ensure them I was doing this 100% for me and it
was my decision alone. Before this, I had never shared my feelings on Ole Miss
with anyone, so it kind of came as a shock, but at the same time I think deep
down everyone knew how unhappy I was.
So to make this
long, long story a little shorter… I have just finished my second week at UWF
and I love it! Such a great atmosphere and I am really getting to know my
professors and classmates on a level that I haven’t before. I think all along
what I really needed was a smaller school where I could feel more comfortable
and really thrive. I am working part-time at my family business, but I just
applied for a job outside of the family, so fingers crossed! Most importantly,
I feel like myself again. The anxiety I would always have about going back to
school or being away is now gone. I am not embarrassed to say I transferred
home, and I don’t care what other people have to say. I will be moving in to a
house of my own next month, and I am thrilled! I look forward to the future and
all I will learn. I look forward to growing as a person. I am happy!
I don’t want to
make it seem like my experience at Ole Miss was awful and I was miserable the
whole time, because that simply isn’t the case. I met wonderful, wonderful
people there and I had great times with them. I just figured out I would be
happier if I wasn’t there anymore.
I want to thank
my parents for allowing me to fulfill my dream of attending Ole Miss. I learned
so much and really grew up. It is an experience I am very thankful for and I am
humbled by all the lessons I have learned. I also want to thank my parents for
allowing me to change my mind, supporting me in my wishes to transfer, I know
it wasn’t easy for y'all either. Thank you to everyone who has supported me
along this journey and continuing to support me!
Thanks for reading, I know it was long,
but I am glad I finally was able to say what I wanted to say!
xo,
xo,
claudia
Transferring is definitely not an easy process. I went to my dream school freshman year and realized academically it wasn't exactly on target.
ReplyDeleteYou are so brave! I earned my business degree at a school I stuck through specifically because I thought transferring meant 'giving up'. My one regret in life is not moving to a school that I fit in better, with more like minded people. Transferring is not giving up - it's being so confident in what you want, that you'll do anything you can to achieve it. You go girl! I hope the transition goes smoothly for you! <3 Xoxo Mindy
ReplyDeleteI am glad you have gained the courage to make such a difficult decision! xo
ReplyDeleteSO well written Claud!! So glad you're happy to be home :) Miss you! xo -Riles
ReplyDeleteI went to my "dream school" freshman year and transferred back to UWF as well. Now I live far from home, and I am so thankful I had a few more years to enjoy Pensacola with my family! It was great to have the college experience and the opportunity to network in a place I was comfortable. Best of luck with the rest of your college experience.
ReplyDeleteI am so excited for you! College should be enjoyable, and I'm glad that you are now able to fully enjoy yourself :)
ReplyDeleteXO, SS || Seersucker Sass
It's definitely not easy to make such a huge decision but you are being so courageous!
ReplyDeleteI think as long as you follow your heart you're doing the right thing!
I know its not easy, but you had to do what was best for you. Good luck as you continue or degree at UWF!
ReplyDeletexx,
Amanda || www.fortheloveofglitter.com
I transferred schools for my junior year of college as well. I moved because I wanted to be in the city and my initial college choice was in a small college town. In the long run I did miss parts of my first school (like my sorority and friends I'd met there) but I was happy to live in the city where I feel I thrive. Good luck with your decision!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy that you're happy, even if it means transferring! I hope you finally can truly enjoy college!
ReplyDeleteLauren | The Arizona Prepster
I transferred colleges in undergrad and it was the BEST decision I could've ever made — I couldn't even imagine my life now if I hadn't transferred. Good luck! Be confident in your decision!
ReplyDeleteKayla || Keynotes from Kay